thoughts on divorce
now, few people standing before their family, friends, and God exchanging vows expect to get divorced. shit happens. i understand that. i, however, do not believe in divorce.
maybe, being a child of divorce, has led me to this belief. i believe in choosing your spouse carefully and working through the rest. no one said it was easy. you have to meld the lives of two adults and eventually incorporate children. it's all a process and it's a blend of compromise and compassion. i'm actually surprisingly traditional in my views of marriage. i will take my husband's last name. as independent as i am, i believe in the joint union in all of its manifestations. i will cook for him and take care of him, as i expect to be taken care of...i'm serious, my left shoulder almost always needs a massage. i can't promise i'll like him everyday, or that we won't need to retreat to our respective corners, but i will always love him and know i'm loved in return.
i know it sounds very idealistic of me, but what else should you expect? i'm not going to walk into a marriage with anything less. i don't expect him to be perfect..Lord knows i'm far from that...but i expect unbridled devotion and respect...oh, and lots of laughter.
i can't really foresee a scenario which would end in divorce --especially with the devotion and respect in tact. i think the only time i'd bounce is with either chronic infidelity or abuse. short of that, you work through that shit.
i just feel like people take marriage too lightly sometimes. i don't feel like a lot of people recognize and respect the level of commitment that is involved. you are promising to spend the rest of your natural life exclusively with one person. you are building a life with triumphs and tragedies, raising children, creating a home, and generally sharing the ins and outs of your day with this one person. that's huge. that's scary. that's not a whimsical, drunken decision you make one night in a drive-thru chapel in Vegas.
i don't know. all i know is that when i get married, i will take my duties of a wife seriously, as i expect him to take the duties of a husband seriously. basically, i can't promise dinner will always delicious or char-free, but i promise to try. in return, i expect him to politely distribute the nasty food around on his plate, console me as i cry from shame, and wipe my tears away while dialing Papa Johns.
maybe, being a child of divorce, has led me to this belief. i believe in choosing your spouse carefully and working through the rest. no one said it was easy. you have to meld the lives of two adults and eventually incorporate children. it's all a process and it's a blend of compromise and compassion. i'm actually surprisingly traditional in my views of marriage. i will take my husband's last name. as independent as i am, i believe in the joint union in all of its manifestations. i will cook for him and take care of him, as i expect to be taken care of...i'm serious, my left shoulder almost always needs a massage. i can't promise i'll like him everyday, or that we won't need to retreat to our respective corners, but i will always love him and know i'm loved in return.
i know it sounds very idealistic of me, but what else should you expect? i'm not going to walk into a marriage with anything less. i don't expect him to be perfect..Lord knows i'm far from that...but i expect unbridled devotion and respect...oh, and lots of laughter.
i can't really foresee a scenario which would end in divorce --especially with the devotion and respect in tact. i think the only time i'd bounce is with either chronic infidelity or abuse. short of that, you work through that shit.
i just feel like people take marriage too lightly sometimes. i don't feel like a lot of people recognize and respect the level of commitment that is involved. you are promising to spend the rest of your natural life exclusively with one person. you are building a life with triumphs and tragedies, raising children, creating a home, and generally sharing the ins and outs of your day with this one person. that's huge. that's scary. that's not a whimsical, drunken decision you make one night in a drive-thru chapel in Vegas.
i don't know. all i know is that when i get married, i will take my duties of a wife seriously, as i expect him to take the duties of a husband seriously. basically, i can't promise dinner will always delicious or char-free, but i promise to try. in return, i expect him to politely distribute the nasty food around on his plate, console me as i cry from shame, and wipe my tears away while dialing Papa Johns.
posted by badassed at
11:38 PM
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