the silliness that is Walker...and a wedding sent from the gods

my uncle won't shut up. i think he may actually be incapable of self-discipline.

god love him for it

today was my oldest brothers' wedding and it was fantastic. more on that in a minute. back to my uncle...or "big head," as i like to call him. at the reception, he gets the microphone and begins to toast my brother. i went over to my mom and whispered, "i think every Walker in this room is holding their breath." she laughed and agreed. you really just never know what's going to come out of his mouth. sometimes it's the most despicable thing you've ever heard:

Big Head: "you know, the best place to find a woman is at either a baby shower or the maternity ward. especially those single mothers."
Me: "that is so fucked up. ooh, you know you're a predator."
Big Head: (laughs) "yea."

other times is something fairly nice and sincere. fucking with him is like fucking with vegas. that shit's all a gamble.

so, the wedding. the wedding was at the st. louis botanical gardens. ever since i flew in on wed. it's been raining buckets here. seriously, yesterday was the first day of sun i've seen since i touched down. the weather couldn't have been more perfect. it was warm enough where all of the ladies could wear their respective fly-ass outfits, but not hot enough to sweat your hair out. it was a good look.

the wedding itself was really cute. his, now, wife is from spain and so they said their vows in both english and spanish. the dude performing the ceremony butchered the spanish and my brother had to read out of the book the dude had to get his vows right. you could see him cracking jokes to her the whole time, which clearly relaxed her, but also made for great shots.

i was really glad to see his father there. i have always liked him, and watching him today with everyone was so dope. at one point my older brother had him laughing so hard he was buckled to the ground. that made for a couple of great shots. everyone was laughing and having a really good time.

the reception was in this hotel...a rather sha-wanky hotel, actually. there were rose petals on the tables, an ice sculpture, and bottles of wine. the good news is that most of my family is muslim and can't drink alcohol, so i made out with three bottles of red wine. now i just have to figure out how to get them back up north without fucking up my clothes. my brother and his wife danced their first dance to Sade's "Your Love Is King." it was really very sweet. once the dance floor was opened up to everyone, the DJ started out with Prince's "Kiss." i had my eye on one man to dance with. i sauntered up the table, shaking my ass in my cute little dress and high heel shoes and said, "grandad, you don't have to be rich to be my girl. you don't have to be cool to rule my world. ain't no particular sign i'm more compatible with. i just want your extra time and your...kiss." he got up and we danced our hearts out. after that, you couldn't stop us. it was so much fun. all kinds of soul trains, electric slides, and good ol' fashioned ass shakin' was the order of the day. trust me...with all of those Walkers around, there was a lot of ass to shake. we worked it out. shit, don't sweat the technique.

the one thing i can say about Walkers is that we may be unpredicitable. we may be a handful. we may work your nerves...but you will always have a good time with us.

tonight was no different.